Hello, again lovely people. What a time to be alive, right? I mean is it just me or is life really hitting the fan at the moment? Time goes by so fast, everything feels like a blur and I am just trying to go along trying to do this thing called life.
I am not really the type of person who likes it when people feel bad for me. I am the "I'm good; don't worry about me; I got this; don't cry for me Argentina- type of girl. So, because I don't like people feeling sorry for me I guess I started feeling sorry for myself.
Between uni, work, family, friends, working out, blogging, trying to maintain a solid relationship
with God and adulting; I feel pretty overwhelmed.
My life has just been really busy recently and I have got to admit that I have been throwing myself a couple of pity parties because of that.
And they have been nice and everything. You know overspending, overeating, overreacting and justifying everything with "just really having a hard time" works for a while, but if it's not your character (not sure about the overspending part but definitely not the others) you will have to check yourself at some point and try to get it together.
So what do we do as good Christians? Of course: we pray about it. And the only response I have been getting from God on this issue is: "Ashley, you are graced for this."
"Huh?! Graced for this? Graced for what? This mess called my life? I am ex-haus-ted (*clapping between every syllable in prayer*) I am tired, I can't do this anymore."
Let me tell you what is wrong with self-pity as Christians and why it is a dangerous path to walk on.
1. The devil will have one up on us
The moment our complaints are louder than our praise we block the blessings of God and block our connection to heaven.
The language of heaven is thankfulness and praise. God doesn't speak complain. We can't come before Him nagging and complaining all the time. Yes, sure, He is a God who understands your struggles at work and why you're so tired but He has also given us enough reasons to praise Him.
One thing that gives us victory over the enemy is that we are one with the Father and our connection to Him. Self-pity gives the enemy a good ground to plant seeds of discontentedness. He will convince you that God has forgotten about you, that you're not enough and that there is no way you will ever overcome. And he won't have a hard time convincing you, because you have already convinced yourself. He just needs to tune into the song you already started singing.
Let's talk about the Israelites for a moment, shall we? They were complaining all the time! And there is one statement they made in Numbers 13:33 ...and we were like grasshoppers in our own sight, and so we were in their sight.
There was no need for anybody to convince them that they could not come against them because they convinced themselves. They were defeated because of their mindset. If we think of ourselves as grasshoppers that's exactly what we're going to be. You are not a Charity case you are a Child of God.
2. We will become ungrateful
To pity ourselves is just another way of discrediting God for who He is. Thankfulness and gratitude are so important and attract the blessings of God. You're not doing a self a favor by pitting yourself neither are you getting Gods attention by complaining but by practicing gratefulness in the midst of it all.
Count your blessings one by one. Write them down if need be. Testify to yourself, encourage yourself; recall the faithfulness of God in your life and be thankful to God for allowing you to be alive.
Self-pity exaggerates our hurts and pain and failures. It gives them more worth than they actually have because we are so focused on everything that seems to be working against us. Try to focus on everything that has been working for you and see the difference.
give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
1 Thessalonians 5:18
3. Watch who you invite to your pity party
It's one thing to pity yourself but if you have friends who feed into your negativity you might as well throw your entire life away. Lol. If you don't have one single person around you who can tell you the truth about yourself from a God perspective you're in some serious trouble. There are certain friends (and you know who you are) I could never call and tell them some sad; depressing story about myself and they'd be here for it. They will check me real quick. And this reminds me of my mum and my older sister. Let me tell you...my mother does not feel an inch of pity for my sister as she is just exploring motherhood. She'll help, She'll advise but she is not about to join a pity party for poor new mummy because she did it before. Four times, by herself without complaining. She knows that it was never going to be easy but she knows that God chose my sister as a mum for a reason and graced her to be a good one, just like her. These are the kind of people you want to have around you. People who will point you back to God.
Know whatever you're going through that God entrusted you with this season and time and circumstance for a reason. You are here for such a time as this. That's why God doesn't pity us. Because He knows who He chose. He knows what He is doing and we shouldn't pity ourselves either because we trust Him. Right?
I am going to tell you the same thing God told me concerning this issue. "You are graced for this. My Grace is sufficient. There is nothing I'd require of you that you're not able to overcome. I am with you and I am for you, not against you.
- God
I hope this helped you turn off the music and shut the pity party down for good. And if not, don't hesitate to DM me or Email me for prayer or further advice. The struggle is real but God is faithful. Until next time my loves. Be inspired
Ashely, xx
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it
1 Corinthians 10:13
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