...your desire shall be for your husband but he shall rule over you.
Genesis 3:16
Did you know that as wives we were never meant to have authority over our husband's? We're not called to dominate or rule over them. It's not a comfortable truth for many women but it's scriptural. As Godly wives, the word of God is our constitution. Our lives, marriages and ministries rise and fall by us regarding or disregarding God's word for us. Unfortunately there is a strong Jezebel Spirit ruling in this generation disguised as empowered women and feminist activists.
There are many lies the world feeds women that confuses us about our role.
As a Christian woman, I love to know any and everything God says about us. It's a passion of mine to study the Bible on women and see the heart of God for His daughters. And of course there are the nice, cute verses that empower me and make me feel like the giant in the Spirit that God created me to be and then there are passages of scripture that confuse me and leave me with questions.
The b part of Genesis 3:16 is definitely one of them. I never quiet understood that scripture and after reading it over and over again and still not catching the revelation, I simply categorized it as : "To whom it may concern" because if there's one thing I knew it' was that ain't no man ruling over me.
When we read God's word which is life and spirit, with our human mindset which is death and full of our flesh, there will always be room for misunderstanding.
The understanding that we have of life, culture and traditional gender roles have been so polluted by this society and our experiences that it's hard for many of us to accept God's design for us as women.
Growing up without a Father or brother, my sisters and I were raised to be independent, strong and bold women of our own. The little glimpse of memories that I have of my Dad as a little girl before he passed away, is of my mum serving my Father food every evening. And I actually loved that perfect picture not knowing that bringing your husband a plate of food when he comes home from work isn't all there is to submission but that there's so much more. The idea of a man ruling over me wasn't a concept I understood until I allowed God to be my Father and husband. It was then that I learnt authority and headship from God's perspective and started to love and embrace it.
I thank God for revelation and for wisdom. Because now I see the beauty of a man ruling over me and that it doesn't have to be a negative thing at all.
We have not been given authority over our husband's. We are not to rule over our husband's. Yet the desire to do so is human. Even God said that we will have the desire to do so but He has placed things in His order for our sake.
I could tell you a beautiful lie that I'm this perfect submissive and obedient wife that loves to listen to Emmanuel at all times but I'm not. I have this strong urge to control what he does, when he does it and even how he does it at times. I guess it's a female thing because we all do it. We ask our husband what outfit we should pick, already knowing in our minds what we want him to answer and the kind of compliment he should add to it.
As much as everyone likes to be in control and have some kind of power, we have to accept that God has not called us to have authority over our husband's to rule over them or to control them. Instead He has given us authority and power over principalities and powers.
Look, I have given you authority over all the power of the enemy, and you can walk among snakes and scorpions and crush them. Nothing will injure you.
Luke 10:19 NLT
Our Authority doesn't lie in giving our husband's the silent treatment until he does what we want, it lies in praying until he does what God wants him to. We are so very powerful without needing the authority over our husband's when we understand the Spiritual Authority that we have. Our husbands are not our enemy. Instead of wasting all our breath nagging and arguing, trying to make him into who we desire him to be, we could be praying to God that He makes him who He desires him to be.
One thing I vowed myself is to never be the kind of wive that joins some desperate housewives club where we nag and complain about our husband's all day long and drag them with our mouths. I'd rather surrounded myself with women who lift their Men up in Prayer and command good over their lives.
If we can only understand the authority that we have when we pray we would stop complaining and start commanding.
A time of prayer is not a time of complaints. It's a time to decree and to declare. To build up and to tear down. To bind and to loose and to allow and forbid. That's the authority we've been given by God and that's so much more powerful than manipulation. The power over principalities and evil spirits is all you need for a successful marriage and for your role as a wife. It's all you need to get your point across. It's all you need to be the most power version of yourself as God desires you to be.
I'm sure we've all heard about the idea that you can change a man or get him to do what you want by exercising "woman power" which means nothing but either giving him the silent treatment or withholding sex until he basically does whatever it is you want him to do. Well, in my short time of being married I'm most definitely no relationship expert and I'm still learning as I'm becoming Mrs. A, but I can definitely say that that's not true. Don't get me wrong, it may work for some but it's definitely not biblical.
Whatever it is that you don't like about your husband or where you would like to see a difference can be established by prayer. God cares even about the little details. Let's say you would like for your man to be more romantic, bring it before God in prayer instead of being in your feelings. God can show you how to adress it and communicate it in a way that your husband will understand. Look at Queen Esther and how prayer and fasting helped her bring up a difficult topic to her husband without him getting defensive or mad. It took the grace of God and prayer for her to get that kind of wisdom.
Your true womanhood was made for the Glory of Jeus Christ. Know that God's order for marriage is perfect and complete. The way He put things in place is for our good and our well-being. Its to ensure that our marriages are a reflection of heavenly order. My fleshly desire will always want to rule and control my husband. But God's order decrees that it shall not be so. Whenever we find ourselves in that conflict, let us remind ourselves of this scripture and be women in who God delights Himself as we accept the authority of our husband's and take charge of our lives and families by operating, not from our flesh but legislating from the spirit realm.
This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands.
1 Peter 3:5 NLT
I'm sure we've all heard about the idea that you can change a man or get him to do what you want by exercising "woman power" which means nothing but either giving him the silent treatment or withholding sex until he basically does whatever it is you want him to do. Well, in my short time of being married I'm most definitely no relationship expert and I'm still learning as I'm becoming Mrs. A, but I can definitely say that that's not true. Don't get me wrong, it may work for some but it's definitely not biblical.
Whatever it is that you don't like about your husband or where you would like to see a difference can be established by prayer. God cares even about the little details. Let's say you would like for your man to be more romantic, bring it before God in prayer instead of being in your feelings. God can show you how to adress it and communicate it in a way that your husband will understand. Look at Queen Esther and how prayer and fasting helped her bring up a difficult topic to her husband without him getting defensive or mad. It took the grace of God and prayer for her to get that kind of wisdom.
Your true womanhood was made for the Glory of Jeus Christ. Know that God's order for marriage is perfect and complete. The way He put things in place is for our good and our well-being. Its to ensure that our marriages are a reflection of heavenly order. My fleshly desire will always want to rule and control my husband. But God's order decrees that it shall not be so. Whenever we find ourselves in that conflict, let us remind ourselves of this scripture and be women in who God delights Himself as we accept the authority of our husband's and take charge of our lives and families by operating, not from our flesh but legislating from the spirit realm.
This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They put their trust in God and accepted the authority of their husbands.
1 Peter 3:5 NLT
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